Why You Shouldn’t Text Your Ex Boyfriend? What To Do Instead?

Since your boyfriend broke up with you, everybody you run into has probably given you advise. You can also find plenty of advise about getting your ex back on the Internet and in magazines. All of it seem to revolve around the same theme, you have to let him go and stop having any contact with him. Of course, that’s easier said than done, with all of the modern communication methods such as text and email.

Every time you pick up your cell phone or start up your computer, the temptation is there. Using the phone is a little different because you can be humiliated by your ex hanging up on you, but you can text and get what you want to say off your chest without any fear of your ex hanging up on you. However, as far as he is concerned you are still violating his privacy and he will be irritated.

If you keep pounding him with text, your ex boyfriend is going to lose all respect for you and you will never get him back. You are in practically the same position as an alcoholic. You want to quit, but the temptation is too great, which means you have to do the same as an alcoholic does and take it one day at a time and get help because this can be more than you can fight alone.

Your relatives and best friend will be happy to help you. But you have to make it clear that you are trying to keep from having any contact with your ex boyfriend and you are having a problem with the temptation to text or email him. You will find that they will be glad to have you text or email them and they will carry on a conversation with you or spend time with you to get your mind off your ex.

Finding other interests like taking up a hobby, concentrating more on your job or doing volunteer work can keep your mind occupied and help ease the temptation to contact your ex boyfriend. Tell yourself that everyday you go without contacting the man you love, you are pulling him back to you. This is true because soon he will feel that you are deliberately ignoring him and men can’t stand the thought of their ex girlfriend ignoring them.

As soon as your ex boyfriend realizes that you are moving on with your life without him, it will put a new slant on the breakup. He will feel as though you have somehow managed to dump him and he will be embarrassed. Suddenly he will be the one with the urge to call or text you. He will probably be a little sly about it and send a text asking you if he left a sweater or something at your place. This will only be to see how fast you will answer him.

Hold out and make him call. When your ex boyfriend calls treat him like an old friend and if he asks if you still love him, tell him you will always care for him, but don’t mention the word love. It won’t take him long to see that the breakup was a mistake and he will be doing his best to get you back.

4 Responses to “Why You Shouldn’t Text Your Ex Boyfriend? What To Do Instead?”

  • TommyKay:

    Been together for 1yr total. He is 35, never married, no kids, only 1 other serious relationship. I am 28, never married, two kids (5&7),1 serious relationship. He is a little insecure and jealous.

    I NEVER doubted him or had urge to snoop till he started acting weird. We found out was pregnant, I was scared he was happy. Then we had miscarriage. Been an issue of him saying he didn’t know he could handle raising someone else’s kids. Says he likes them but pregnancy made him realize he was getting ready to form instant family. Got scared. Said he needed some space, He broke up w/me for one month, dated an ex fling. During that month though we still saw each other almost daily. I asked if another woman involved he said no, I didn’t believe him. I decided I had to know, guessed his voice mail code and confirmed info. I confronted him he admitted to it. About the third week broken up he said he realized he couldn’t live without me, wanted me back. We got back together.

    I forgave him b/c in my eyes he did break up with me before he started seeing her but my trust was damaged. I explained he had to regain it. I still felt something amiss, started reading text msgs, he was having sexual conversations w/other woman. Asked him, he denied anything. Finally couldn’t resist & guess code for his email. Saw emails from girls from past relationships & into about the first 3 months of dating me. We talked, I confessed that I read txt msgs. He said wanted 2 b w/me, he said he would cut off all ties to the other women. I didn’t snoop for a while. A note before u think I am controlling. I said he could talk to other woman as friends but sexual conversations were unacceptable, disrespectful to me however HE would get upset at me for any male friends I had. Then about 3 wks ago had a feeling and decided to read email, found one from a girl wanting to meet him. I still said nothing b/c he didn’t respond. Its been eating me up inside,

    I finally Confessed EVERYTHING last night. Told him what I done wasn’t right & I knew it & I was sorry. Asked for his forgiveness. Now he says we need to end relationship b/c I had betrayed his privacy/trust beyond repair. I said I forgave him for betraying me so why can’t he forgive me? I feel so much better confessing to him. I honestly thought it would make him have a lil more respect for me though. That for all of that time I knew he was having inappropriate contact with other women but that I still stayed 100% faithfully by his side. Instead though he said all it did was disgust him. I told him I could have kept it hidden that I had done it but I thought we were strong enough that I could confess and we would work through it. He said I shouldn’t have said anything. Now he says we have no reason to be together…

    Yesterday am he had flowers, balloon sent to me for our 1 yr anniversary and told me how much he loved me. Then today though he says it has to be over? Maybe I shouldn’t fight to keep him anymore…………..

  • Muzahid:

    My boyfriend talks to his ex girlfriend pretty much every day. She keeps telling him she loves him and that they are great together. He’ll stop talking to her and lets me know. Then a few days later they start talking again.I’ve told him how I feel about it and he understands. He tells me I have nothing to worry about, but I have been hurt a lot in the past. I’m getting really tired of being so paranoid, but I just can’t help it. I really want to trust him but I’m finding it hard too.She lives closer to him than I do. She sometimes goes to his house to visit him. He’ll text me and ask if it’s okay.How do i know that something is not going on? That is the scary part. I would really appreciate it if I could get some advice. This whole situation is really stressing me out.

  • addmeonxbox360myuserisfallior:

    This girl I started dating back in July had a ex right before me.. as in few days according to facebook comments/pictures. She has asked about my ex when i said we broke up and stuff. Also, were not “officially” boyfriend/girlfriend but i think its understood? She never told me what happened and I want to ask. Should I ask what happened or does that seem insecure or weird in any way? Also, should i have “the talk” about what we are doing w/ our relationship? she told me she loved me after about 2 months of dating and i recently told her it back this week… also, should I be ok if they just talk? but what if its more than that?

    Also, the other night/morning we were together and I took a glance at her phone while she was checking her texts. (i wasnt creeping i just happened to see it) The guys name came up after my last text message to her (which was at around 2AM and she was checking her messages at 9AM [the time we were hanging out] so it means he texted her between that timeframe…. which is weird to me if they aren’t dating). Strange to me…

    Another thing, I think she mentioned to him about me and he said that he knows me because he once purchased something from me (i do not remember at all nor do i know him).. not sure what this means

    Finally, I once told her that someone told me she had a boyfriend where she lived and I asked her the night after and she said no but that she used to date him. Another thing is that she told me she loved me and I am sure she means it… I just want to know what there friendship/relationship is like if they still talk… How do I go about this?

    also, i am pretty insecure about this because i do not want to emotionally invest myself into someone if the end result is just going to be heartbreak due to that guy

  • zaclo:

    I was at a party last night and my ex boyfriend was there too. We are still good friends so I was sitting next to him on the sofa having a hug when he squeezed my waist and called me fat! I’m not necessarily fat, I mean, I have more fat than I should have in some places, but I’m not overweight. The thing is, he called me fat and laughed, like it wasn’t a big deal. Although he laughed he wasn’t joking. Obviously this pissed me off, but instead of getting angry With him, I walked off, cried a little (pathetic, i know) and went home. He’s never been that horrible to me before and I really don’t think I deserved it. So basically I’m asking what would you do? ‘Cause at the moment, I’m Just ignoring him, he left school in may so I barely see him anyway. He text me this morning saying ‘i’m really deeply sorry for anything i said i never wanted to upset you im so sorry ly xxx’ he’s sorry, but he doesn’t know what for?! Idiot.
    I feel like a heffalump.

    I’m 16, 5ft6 and 8st10 if that helps x
    Sorry to put in this categories but no one answered before x

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